Written 1st June 2007

Just had the most amazing news from Canada: Joyce Connor is coming back to the UK to live coz she wants to be near me. Hey, that's loyalty for you. Well, I'm made up, simply coz she's hot sex on legs. PLUS she's a very special sort of woman. She's a born genius. Her art is serious. What a talent she's got.

Joyce saw me through some crazy times and I hope I saw her through too, coz her life's not exactly been boring or normal. You'll have to wait and read her book. It's all in there. Hey, you think you've got problems ... you wait to read what she's been through. She was used, abused and stitched right up, which left her in the darkness for years. But all fighters survive and she surely did.

Joyce has that special ingredient in a woman that not all have: it's called bollocks! She's got balls ... balls of steel. Bottle.  can be one crazy bitch. It's why I'm so close to her. WE have a lot in common. Some will call it madness. I call it mutual respect. Any way, watch this space. She's coming home.

Hey, who knows what's ahead. Maybe a baby Bronson. Fate is strange for all of us. You just have to go along with it and hope it comes sweet. All that love crap don't come into it. I'm long past all that nonsense. Love is for the fairies. I'm more into soul connection ... a deep rooted base of togetherness. Reach within and search and find ... then have a good shag later! We shall see.

I've had some magic visits lately. Tel Currie and his dad; we always have a good meet up, but they're both sick of the closed visits. They call it The Zoo and they're not far wrong either. Then Big John and Glynis and my Wyn came up; we always have a good laugh ... it's like a family get together. And I still see Stu Cheshire and his old man Henry; two loyal friends to me. And then I see my old buddy Ray Williams with my brother Mark and Mum. So, all in all, a great month for visits. When I'm on a visit I'm out of prison! I must have eaten thirty chocolate bars this month and drunk a dozen milk-shakes. If I stopped training I'd blow up to forty stone! All in all May was a great month.

Now it's June. It's my wedding anniversary today to Saira. What a farce that was. But like I always say: if you don't dip your finger in the pie you'll never know how it tastes. Thank fuck the divorce went through, coz by now I would have gone mad.

It's also my son's 36th birthday on Tuesday. 36! Old Git!!! I'll send him a drink. Only wish I was there ... it's time we had a good piss up.

Almost forgot: I've just finished reading the most amazing book. "Defending the Indefensible - The Devil's Advocate" by Giovanni di Stefano. What a read if you're into law. You have got to read it. It's a must read. Read and Learn ... and the cover is awesome. This has to be my book of the year to date.

I see they're still on about the imaginary Calvin Klein specs. It's now become a joke!

I think Mal is bored with it now and so am I!

Forget it.

In fact I may as well get a pair now just so the newspapers don't turn into liars.

NOTE FROM MAL: Heaven forbid. I notice that they quote me out of context, conniving little shits. Let's put a couple of things straight chaps:

a) Charlie does need tinted glasses. They are VERY deeply tinted because of what 34 years of artificial lighting has done to his eyes.

b) I was talking about MY OWN reading glasses in the quote you've used.

c) To my certain and absolute knowledge Charlie never mentioned anything about Calvin Klein glasses. Or any other designer brands.

c) Charlie donated the £100 that received in compensation for his smashed glasses to Zöe's Place Baby Hospice. See their Thank You card HERE.

Anyway, don't forget Mark Emmins. He's got a few boxes of "Free Bronson" T-shirts and car stickers. Keep the campaign rocking. I respect your support. Call him up on 01409 259232